The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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