If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Randomize
