things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
I think pants incapable of making pants work
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
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