you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
