Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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