you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize
