No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
