i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize