i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
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