hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
