no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
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