Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
