break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
