Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
