how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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