i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
Randomize
