Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Randomize
