i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
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