How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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