now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
