your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
Randomize
