As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
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