do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
