My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
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