I hate your face
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
