no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
Randomize
