I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Randomize
