do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
Randomize
