Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize