How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
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