Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Randomize