I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Randomize