Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize