How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
Randomize
