Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
Randomize