Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
I need a burrito and a hug.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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