When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
