We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Randomize
