i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
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