What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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