i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
