Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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