Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
Randomize
