You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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