Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
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