but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
