Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
Randomize
