Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
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