:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
where does the pee come out of this thing
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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