Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
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