We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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